
REBIRTH
“I’m ready now,” he said. “Let’s make love.”
She turned to him, smiling. “You are a romantic. Maybe you should buy me dinner first, big boy.”
“I’m serious.”
Her smile slowly faded. “You're serious? Here? You want to do it here?”
“Yes, now, here. Yes, I am deadly serious. I want a child. I want a child with you.”
“Here? In the grass? Aren’t there . . . people around?”
He smiled. “No, look around. There is no one around. I lay down my coat and we are under the skies, among the breeze.”
“Among a bunch of large dead oak trees?”
“Look, I know this sounds crazy but it makes perfect sense.” He took her shoulders gently in his hands. “These oaks aren’t dead. We had them at my house growing up. You think they are but they still have a lot of life in them. They will bounce back. They always do, year after year.”
She put her thumb between her teeth and looked down the hill, then past the row of large oak trees. “So, you do want a child? We talked about it and you always . . . well, never wanted to talk about it.”
“Yes,” he said, “You know I do, I just didn’t feel like it was time. For some reason, now, now, I feel . . . it’s time.”
Her smile met his and he led her under a large oak tree, void of leaves, its bark jagged and coarse. Its trunk was mammoth and it was there at the base, that I was conceived.
16 comments:
ah, once again a fun little twist at the end. pretty good, for something done on the fly like that.
Not sure how proud I am of this -- it took ten minutes to write and then two weeks for me to post it. That says a lot, I am afaid.
Love the picture and the contrast of death and life. I agree with lime...the ending did have a fun twist.
lol, i have done more posts like that than you may ever know, david.
Very good contest, that. Thought it 'sparked' right across the board; & liked your directness. I forgot to post my own entry on my blog until some time later as well; and wrote very much 'off the cuff' as you did...first piece of flash fiction writing I've done.
Sigh.
I love your writing, but I must be getting old. All I could think of was how cold it would be making love outdoors in winter.
I haven't tried flash fiction, but reading your piece makes me want to. (Want to what, you ask?) :)
Don't you realize,
My little Buckaroo,
That it was from a little acorn,
That the Oak tree grew?
These were my thoughts.........
I recall reading this on Bernita's blog - it's lovely - sort of has a touch of whimsy about it. A gentle story with a neat twist at the end. Little acorns, mighty oaks. :-)
I deleted me, for TMI
irishkat _ Thank you. That was it -- the contrast of death and life. They so often go hand in hand. Thanks for reading.
lime _ Me too, Lime, me too. Sad to think that so many have gotten through my internal editing machine, though.
Julie _ I liked your story. I liked a lot of the stories posted. It was really a wonderful mix of writers, and pieces. And in thinking on it, I guess I have done more "flash fiction" than I was aware of, sad to say.
HinSF _ Yes, it probably would be cold. I thought it all seemed "not perfect" -- the cold, the big old trees, out there in the open. I thought it kind of fun that his need superseded all those things. Somehow, it felt right.
I hadn't heard the phrase "flash fiction" until recently and I reckon you -- like I -- may have done more flash pieces than you are aware of.
Sharon _ What? What? I wasn't the first to think of this? (I love that little song.)
Absolute Vanilla _ I liked your piece very much. You did a lot more thinking than I -- really pushed the creative block. I think you entered late in the game like I did, if I recall.
Taffiny _ I read it and didn't think it was TMI at all. I thought it splendid. Thanks for reading, Ms Taffiny.
happy new year to you, mr. wit !!!
xxx
red
You make me laugh, Ms Red. I am far from wit(ty).
Anyway, thank you. And Happy New Year to you. May it be red and wonderful all year long.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year, David!
Welshcakes Limoncello and Vesper _ And a very Happy New Year to you both.
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